"Celebrating the Ascent" © 2012~ watercolor by Carol E. Fairbanks

                                            Mountaintop Teachings

"Climbing a mountain can help you with your spiritual body. This is where you build character - on a mountaintop."  
                                                              ~ Hulda Crooks ( who hiked mountains well into her 90's!)

In 1987, after I had been an avid walker for several years, I subscribed to Walking Magazine and read about Hulda Crooks.  Amazingly, she was then 91 years old and still hiking mountains.  Her example further awakened the "wild woman walker" in me, as I traveled to of total of 43 states, doing more than 850 volkswalks, including two marathons!  All this from a former sedentary female who had no interest in sports or physical activity and hadn't walked more than 2 miles at a time ever!  Twenty six years have passed since I read that inspiring article, and both Walking Magazine and Hulda Crooks have made their "transitions".  But I am still on the trail seeking new adventures, even after a "dance" in 1999 with a life threatening illness.

So I ask myself at this point in my life, "What next?"  I seem to be going through a period of chaos and "spring cleaning" lately, in letting go of old perceptions and beliefs.  Of course, with that reorganization of my inner belief system, the outer appearances of relationships and conditions in my life have been shifting considerably. As I look down from my "mountaintop" experiences lately ( both actual and inner emotional),  I see some areas of my life that are no longer working for me.  The act of letting go, however,  has never been easy, as evidenced by my "claw marks" in those things which I have released.

I believe my life's focus needs be on whatever supports me in more fully expressing my true Self.  And just what is my true Self?  Since I am created in the image and likeness of God, and God is Love, I, therefore am also Love.  In reflection, I want to be in situations with people who encourage and support  that greatest degree of Love that is possible in me.  (In theory, maybe there is no limit of that fullest degree, except within my own mind!)  So the big question I am asking about every person, belief and condition in my life, is "Are you supporting a greater degree of the expression of Love within me?"  In other words, "Am I more loving because you are part of my life?"

These questions sound simple, but they are no less profound.  When I climb those mountains in my life, whether a real peak in the Mt. Hood Wilderness or a challenging verbal exchange with an emotionally close relationship, I can view my experience from a "higher" perspective and find the "Love" in it.  The lesson is always there, guiding me toward a new view of who I really am.  I am not to hold on to anyone or anything that sabotages this personal growth, nor am I to interfere with someone's else's journey by insisting they meet my expectations. This Truth is both freeing and anxiety producing, especially when I want to latch on to someone or something for an illusion of security.

So those mountaintop experiences help "build" stamina in my spiritual body by flexing the muscles of my true Self.  I am more rooted and grounded in my relationship to myself and my world when I stand upon that peak and breath in that expansive experience. From that confident place of higher awareness, I can "see" and honor the Love that weaves through me and all creation.  Fear is replaced with a quiet knowing that purrs with contentment.  The "I AM" part of me is not who is with me or what I have, but rather is something much bigger.  The edges of who "I AM" are not walled off with sentries guarding the so called "treasures" of my individual identity. If who "I AM" is reflected in every person I meet and every experience that I have, then perhaps, the "I AM" of me is much, much more. It's like trying to visually imagine the far reaches of an infinite Universe. The finite mind wants limits and boundaries, while the true Self is boundless. It is only in my mountaintop experiences, with my horizons expanding beyond my perceived limits, can I finally begin to "see" the larger picture of my life.

Okay, who am I?  I am not quite sure yet.  Who knows how many more "mountains" I need to climb, before I can answer that question?  Meanwhile....here I go, upward and onward!

At the summit of Tom, Dick & Harry by Mt. Hood   (9/4/13)