The Wild Woman Walker: 2013

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

".... I swear I will not dishonor my soul with hatred,

but offer myself humbly as a guardian of nature,
a healer of misery,
as a messenger of wonder,
as an architect of peace."
~ Diane Ackerman

"Peace Begins with Me"

On the day I was born, the world was at war. With the attack on Pearl Harbor in December of 1941, the United States was drawn into that ominous conflict. And at the time of my birth, the following January 30th, it was a time of fear and much anxiety for the future of the world. The hope of "peace on earth", that was proclaimed that first Christmas, seemed to be an impossible dream, as the whole world waged war.

Seventy one years later, the countries of the world are still searching for a way to make that promise of "peace" a reality. World leaders come and go, and the violence and killing, often of innocent people, continue somewhere on the planet, in the name of justice and human rights. When will we learn that the means we use in our quest for "peace" determine the end? Violent methods will only bring more violence and hatred, never that "peace" that our hearts long for.

So at this time of reflection, at the end of the year, when we celebrate several major religious holidays, I think about the hope that was proclaimed that first Christmas - "Peace on Earth, good will to all." While I would love to make all conflict among people cease on the planet, and, that is my prayer, I know as long as the people of earth continue to think competitively and perceive someone who is different, as a person to be feared, war and violence will always be with us. If we keep believing that there is not enough of that "good" for everyone, we will forever see fighting for our needs as necessary to our survival.

It is time for all people everywhere to begin to practice a "new" philosophy of life and truth. And it must begin in each person's heart, the only place where the truth can possibly take root and grow. As we nurture that growth of "new" belief, with love and compassion for ourselves and others, we can finally know another way of being and relating to one another.

It's not like I am suggesting something that has never been thought of before. Great teachers like Gandhi, Mandela, Jesus and Buddha, as well as many others wise souls, have professed this ancient wisdom all throughout the ages. But when we hear that talk of peace, we discuss and write and sing about it. Sadly, that idea of "peace" seems to stay in our head, where our brain finally says to us, "It's a nice idea, but practically speaking, it is not realistic!" So maybe moving those words of "peace" to our hearts, where the truth of our oneness and divinity is recognized and honored, is what is necessary.

That can only be done through an experience of faith and trust in a divine power beyond our personal egoic state. And that requires a quantum leap in consciousness.... that goes way beyond a "them vs. us" mentality to a knowing of our oneness and personal spirituality. Maybe the only part of us that really left the "garden of Eden" is our minds... the thinking part of us that sees ourselves as separate....as a physical form that happens to have a soul.

It's time to remember that we are, in truth, spiritual beings, all "birthed from the ONE CREATOR, and are having a shared human experience. We can choose to suffer, see lack and hurt one another, OR we can finally awaken to that wisdom of oneness that all seekers have known for ages. We, as spiritual beings, are meant to experience "peace", both within and without. Peace is our nature, not this destructive illusion of the need for violence. The choice is ours .... to stay in the lies of darkness or to allow the "birth" of love within our hearts. Our destiny is to finally welcome the "child of Light" to illuminate our way of believing.... to at last know that luminous path to lasting peace on earth is not only possible, it is how things are meant to be. That's the true wonder of the season....the true "peace on earth".

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

"When in doubt..wear red!"

~ Bill Blass

At the Top of the Rainbow

Even on the "other side of the rainbow", you could not find a prettier red than the flowers I encountered at Owen Rose Garden last summer. Red, one of the most vibrant colors of the spectrum, is said to catch people's attention more than any other color. Since several studies have indicated that the color red carries the strongest reaction of all the colors, scientists have repeatedly recommended the color red for warning signals, labels and signs.

Not only is red used in communicating a warning and possible danger , but also red is said to be the color of passion, love, and courage. What would Valentine's day be without those red hearts?! Even nature makes use of red to alert us when fruit ripens, announcing its readiness to be harvested.

If you are experiencing a lack of energy or need a boost of confidence, take a walk past some scenes of red. When you are feeling tired, you might want to "stir your blood" and wear some red. Know that by wearing red you may also be giving others the message that you're dynamic and confident. So be ready to assume leadership!

Okay, how does red affect us so dramatically? Red has the longest wavelength in that visible spectrum we call a rainbow, and that puts red at the top of the spectrum of light that is visible to the human eye. That's right next to the longer wavelengths of infrared light, that is not visible for us to see. Watch out...at the top of the rainbow, things are hot...and exciting ... and very vibrant!

With all of this going for the color red, you might think that nothing could improve its vibrational effect. But on my winter walks this December, the intense nature of red, highlighted with a touch of green and framed beautifully by sparkling white, upped the vibrancy of that color for me. It's red that takes your breath away....it's a color that says "Stop, you can't miss me!"

And if you feel that you need any other colors, just feast your eyes on the snowy white...it contains all the colors of the spectrum!

In order to fare well in this world of ours balance is needed. Too much red and passionate feelings may begin to render us too emotional; too little red and that motivation and energy may not be there when you need it. Nature, being all about the wisdom of balance, frames that energetic red with its cooling complement, green. Our human eyes do a balancing of energies, when viewing both of these colors together and your brain stays relaxed, while your body is being energized!

Anish Kapoor has written, "Red is the colour of the interior of our bodies. In a way, it's inside-out red." Maybe that's the real reason that we feel so alive around the color red. It reflects back to us the very life force that pulses through us. It reminds us that we are fully alive, and that is especially beneficial when we need some encouragement. Red is our cheerleader, our coach, and mother all stirred up in one color. Bill Blass has said. "Red is the ultimate cure for sadness", and I do agree.

If you find your self love needs a jump start... try nuzzling up to a fragrant red rose and see how that feels. More poetry of love has included the imagery of red roses than any other flower, and there must be a reason for that! Could it be that heart-thumping color that wraps its "arms" around you saying "I love you" ? After all, it was Robert Browning who wrote, "My love is like a red, red rose."

So how about it? Did you get your hug from "red" today?

"A Walk in the Snow" ~ December, 2013

"Thank goodness for the first snow, it was a reminder -- no matter how old you became and how much you'd seen, things could still be new if you were willing to believe they still mattered."

~ Candace Bushnell, Lipstick Jungle

" A Walk Through Some White Wisdom"

I wasn't the only one who woke up that Friday morning and looked outside and saw great possibilities for the day. Just about every kid in the Willlamette Valley area was probably scrambling that very moment, looking for their boots and gloves and sled in anticipation of a grand adventure. The whole landscape was transformed into a winter wonderland that discouraged the usual normal nonsense of serious work and instead invited everyone to play. For those of us who had captured the vision of that offering, we saw this white surprise as an opportunity for some serious frivolity. I couldn't get myself together soon enough to test out those possibilities for fun that I was imagining. All the challenges in my life that I was presently dealing with, that normally kept me in bed until late morning, were covered by a blanket of white. No sadness over a broken relationship, no worries about a major car bill, no problem of any kind could undo my enthusiasm for getting outside to that opportunity for pure joy.

In my hike in the snow, I sensed a stillness... a quiet that indicated a slowing down of the usual frantic pace of the world. Very few foolish people dared to venture out in their cars on the roads that were hidden beneath 6 inches of crystalline snow. And those that did were moving with cautious slowness. All the imperfections of the landscape were transformed into a timeless image that looked more like a painting by Currier and Ives than my hometown of Eugene.

The magic of this cold, white landscape landscape seemed to warm everyone's heart, nurturing an atmosphere of community and connection. Never in all my neighborhood walks have I had such fun talking with everyone I met. Even this little dog, wearing his boots and coat, was beside himself with this invitation for winter amusement.

Everyone I stopped to talk with smiled, as they shared their surprise of this unexpected playtime in the snow. There were no complaints from those who embraced that adventure that brought forth memories from past of fun in the snow. Because everything looked new and perfect in the sparking, white snow, we all felt the energy of that idea of perfection. We romped and trudged through the cold, white layer of snow like we were kids, who knew no limits.

While I hiked about 6 challenging miles that day, I remembered the winter of 1954, when I was 11 years old. I had woken up to a similar magical morning one day in the beginning of January, and was having an incredible amount of fun playing in the snow. In the midst of that winter wonderland, and with my childhood belief in unlimited possibilities, I made a wish that it would snow until my birthday on January 30th. Incredibly, it did! And I had even more fun playing in the snow for a month, thinking that it was all for me! I smiled as I thought of that time and realized that I was now feeling the same about my present snow adventure as I had so many years ago.

I met a couple who had just moved here from Alaska. Needless to say, they felt right at home with the unusual winter weather that were having. They sailed smoothly along the snow covered path, while I breathlessly struggled up that snowy hill. Wisdom is about choosing appropriate transportation! And I added a pair of skis to my wish list for Christmas!

The birds also made themselves more visible that day on my trek in the snow. With a covering of white hiding his source of food, this starling really appreciated the food put out in this bird feeding station. Mmmmm.. juicy fruit in the middle of a snow storm! Not a bad breakfast! When someone shares and is generous, everyone benefits. This bird got a great breakfast and I got a good photo, thanks to one person's generosity!

"Sapsucker Search" by Carol E Fairbanks

In the midst of the stillness of the woods, a sapsucker flew hurriedly by and began an earnest search for his food from this tree. All of creation (with the exception of most people) knows that nature provides everything we need. Luckily for us, the animals give us reminders of that true natural harmony that eludes many of us. They demonstrate for us that we all have that instinctive knowing of how to get what we need. It is only in our minds that we have left that "garden of Eden".

But when its snowing and cold, it's nature's signal to slow down and listen. It's time to contemplate the present moment and just "be" for a while. It's a chance to experience yourself as a part of creation... complete within yourself, yet more understood as a part of the grand whole. If you take some time to wait and be still, you won't miss that wonderful new adventure that beckons you. You won't be so busy or tired that when opportunity knocks, you do not hear it. Yes, snow is nature's sign to pay attention by being quiet. This little junco seems to know what to do with this winter day.

So the winter of our lives teaches us the importance of being still at times.... of listening to the wisdom of nature ... of trusting in the goodness of creation. Winter doesn't have to be harsh and unforgiving, if we know how to be in harmony with its gifts. My wonderful walk in the snow reminded me of these simple truths. I wouldn't want the weather to be like this all the time, but for now I am enjoying my winter adventure.

"If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant; if we did not sometimes taste adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome." ~ Anne Bradstreet

Sunday, December 8, 2013

" Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul - and sings the tunes without the words - and never stops at all."

~ Emily Dickinson

"Wisdom Out of the Blue"

Who could not notice the vibrant blue on a stellar jay or a blue bird? Color inspires very definite psychological effects and has been shown scientifically to affect both our physical health, as well as our emotional mood. The color blue is associated with peace and tranquility and is demonstrated to have just that same effect on people, as it calms the nervous system and promotes both physical and mental relaxation. In fact, blue has shown to even aid our digestion and metabolism. And further studies have shown that people are more productive when performing tasks in a blue room.

It seems that blue also affects some animals, as well as humans. Mosquitos are attracted to the color blue twice as much as to any other color. And the owl, an ancient symbol of wisdom, is the only bird that can see the color blue. So why does the color blue affect us so?

While there are many studies that have been done to explore the answer to this question, I believe that there is a logical and simpler explanation for its effect. The color of the water and sky, blue, is a constant in our lives. It's a phenomenon that we not only expect daily, but also we seek it out when we want to vacation and remove stress from our sometimes harried psyches. Just gazing at a placid lake or walking along the ocean shore, with its never ending, rolling waves, makes us feel better. Looking at a blue sky has found to produce endorphin chemicals that are calming to our bodily systems. Even a gazing at a photograph will do the trick! Since the sky and all bodies of water are always there, we have learned to place our assurance in those earthly elements, and with a deep, unshaken trust in those areas of natural blue beauty, we feel greater peace within.

And, as hope grows in our hearts, we experience an inner security and greater confidence in ourselves. We relax, as we learn to rely on the manifestations of blue to guide and support us through those difficult times. Because one can only have lasting hope in the presence of truth, seeking out those experiences which personify that truth are imperative. And where is such truth personified better than in that constant, natural beauty of water and sky? Places, like Crater Lake, give energy and form to our growing sense of hope. Why wouldn't we want to vacation in the midst of the beauty of blue?

The Native Americans, that lived near Crater Lake long ago, believed that this pristine site was sacred and that their gods lived there. In fact, in many cultures, blue has always been perceived as the color of the spirit, devotion and religious study. Research has shown that the color blue enhances contemplation and prayer. In India, paintings of the god, Krishna often depict him as having blue skin. In Iran, blue, blue-green and green are sacred colors, that symbolize paradise. Early Christians chose blue to symbolize God, the Father, and today, the church often uses light blue to symbolize the Virgin Mary. And Mary, often depicted wearing light blue, is the embodiment of love, patience and compassion. Considering that symbology, the benefits of blue seem to come from a wisdom of a higher level of intelligence and indicate a more spiritual perspective.

But blue is not just one expression of color ...it has many variations, all of them affecting us just a little differently. While lighter shades of blue seem to suggest unconditional love and compassion, darker shades of blue, especially indigo, convey a feeling of the night sky and darkness, which are metaphors for going inward to the subconscious to glean insights and understandings. And brilliant blues, rather than being calming, can be quite dynamic and dramatic, expressing exhilaration. And some dark shades, as well as an overuse of blue, can come across as cold and uncaring... maybe even creating a feeling of sadness and melancholia.

It is interesting that the true color of contentment and inspiration is azure. That's the color of the sky when it's at its very best! This also happens to be the color of the vortex of energy that is located in the throat center of the human body. This center, known as the throat chakra, involves the neck, throat, mouth and jaw areas of the body and primarily focuses on communication. This chakra radiates a turquoise blue color, that relates to one-to-one communication, and is especially concerned with using the voice to verbally express one's personal truth. The essence of the 5th chakra in the throat is the principle of connectivity. It likes to create strong, trusting relationships and can enhance our devotion to building and sustaining such bonds. This color blue is idealistic, and it enhances our self expression to communicate our needs and wants. Azure blue inspires us to higher ideals in our life, and my walk at Bandon beach, that glorious day five years ago, certainly did that for me. I had no trouble expressing my overflowing joy that day!

The darker blue of indigo is the color of the third eye chakra, located above the eyebrows in the center of the forehead. It is here that we take command of our lives through the images that we hold in mind. This center is about "seeing" and interpreting what we perceive. As we visualize our dreams, they manifest and become form. That occasional "storm" with its tumultuous waves, that has manifested, can be tamed in the mind. Our thoughts can visualize a calmer version of life. We can see our "troubles" as experiences and grow vigorous and happy, however adverse those experiences may seem.

Within the spectrum of all of the colors, blue is my helper, my rescuer and friend, when I am in need. Through the years, I have built a strong relationship with the color blue, as it nurtures and gives me hope, through both my successes and my challenges. So when I experience a discordant rhythm in my being, I go for a walk on the beach. I hike to a pristine mountain lake and sit for a time, until I feel more hopeful. I languish beside a nurturing waterfall to experience that flow of good within me, while I am rebirthing who I truly am. The gifts of blue seem endless, as they connect the core of my being to the very heartbeat of the universe. The color blue "washes" over me, and it takes away all that is not true.... especially those lies of separation and of not being loved. And then blue, with motherly compassion, enlightens me with the message of its reassuring vibration of oneness and love.

In a world of rainbows, where blue is one of many colors, I know my life requires balance in order to not overdo my experience with blue. Too much might render me rigid and aloof. But, in my heart, I know that my experiences with my wise friend, blue, are actually preparing me for my adventures with those other vibrant colors of the spectrum. It's the true gift of wisdom...out of the blue.

Thursday, December 5, 2013

"In Back of Middle Falls" (Silver Falls SP) © Winter, 2013 ~photo by Carol E Fairbanks

"In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream will always win.... not through strength, but through persistence."

~ Calvert Bullock

" In the Flow of Plenty"

Whether it's December and the volume of water is deafening to listen to, or it's in the middle of the summer, when there has been no rain for weeks, and the amount of water is scant, the falls still keeps going. It doesn't matter if the streams are blessed with lots of water or not, the magical sound of falling water is always heard throughout Silver Falls State Park. Nature is our greatest teacher, always offering her wisdom to inspire us to a greater way of living and being. We, too, can make a choice to be persistent...to keep going no matter what challenges beset us. Water follows the design of natural law, created for the good of all of creation. Too often, we forget that law of goodness and plenty, and look at the lack that has manifested in our life and get discouraged. Our flow of good is stopped by the decision to be out of harmony with that natural law of plenty, and when we stop giving, we stop receiving. With the blockage of that flow of good, we render ourselves out of sync with all of creation and more "lack" inevitably follows.

The consistent movement of the waterfalls mirrors back a lesson of prosperity to us, and maybe, that's the reason why we so love to be near them. Their gentle, yet never ending flow, reminds us of, on a very deep level, the truth of all creation.... a truth that says, when in harmony with spiritual law, "there is always enough"... that by being grateful for everything we have and sharing it with others, we consciously make a choice to be more fully open to the prosperity that the universe always offers.

And if we keep the "flow" going in our minds and in our choices, we can create miracles in our life. We can do wondrous things that some may think is impossible. From the constant current of the south fork of Silver Creek, never stopping, nor pausing to lament its periodic lack of water, a wonderfully impressive gorge was created. That persistent flow of water challenged the hard rock foundation and carved a path that offers spectacular scenery. When I walk the trails of Silver Falls State Park, that follow the route of this daring stream, I am inspired to imitate that persistent flow in my life.

By Middle Falls in the summer ~ 2013

Next to the energy of that falling water, I am inspired to greater confidence...both in my ability to endure and in the support I receive from the universe for my journey. Like the waterfalls, I can keep going...always moving forward, while believing in a benevolent world that we inhabit. If the occasional appearance of lack happens, it is no reason to shut down. I can courageously look within my heart to a greater truth that says there is always enough to for everyone, including me!

So when I need encouragement, I come to the woods. When I crave inspiration to lift me out of my darkness, I stand by a waterfalls. Nature, my sanctuary and comfort, is always there to teach and guide me, as I walk my path through life. What gratitude I feel in this sacred place!

Thursday, November 28, 2013

"When you are grateful - when you can see what you have - you unlock blessings to flow in your life."

~ Suze Orman

Living in Gratitude

Today is Thanksgiving Day, and I just sent e-cards expressing to all my family and close friends how grateful I am for them in my life. How different that feels from affirming my "aloneness" and holding them responsible! I am going to spend today in a consciousness of "plenty"! After all...it's the truth!

Monday, November 25, 2013

"The sea does not reward those who are too anxious, too greedy or too impatient. One should lie empty, open, choiceless as a beach - waiting for a gift from the sea."

~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Experiencing Me at the Sea

Walking on the beach soothes my soul and puts me in touch with a sense of timelessness about my essence. I keep my eyes gently focused on the never ending waves, as they do their dance back and forth with the shore. I go to the beach to be in the presence of something that I can count on.... something whose movement feels changeless. Yet the very nature of the sea, that appears changeless, is to create massive changes in its ebb and flow. At the beach, there are no expectations, no desire to control, no wishing things were different. I slip into that state of being with the rolling waves and, together with the birds, submit to its cycle of coming and going. In harmony, the birds and I move to the rhythm of the sea and feel at one with the power of it.

The massive waves repeatedly hit the rocks, not seeing them as a hindrance to their purpose of reaching edge of the shore. The rushing blue water sprays upward as it jumps, over and around in its relentless desire to move forward. Absolutely nothing changes its focus or stops the flow of its mission to reach the sandy edge of the shore.

I watch in awe as I witness a vision of strength that seems to be directed by a power beyond my comprehension. Could it be that the same power, that directs the never ending waves of the ocean, is within me, guiding and sustaining my journey of life, even when I "crash" into rock-like obstacles?

And when the tumultuous "waves" of life toss an "obstacle" onto the shore that appears to block my path, can I see it as a blessing instead of a hindrance? Am I willing to stop and let go of my agenda of tasks and be quiet, as I listen to its message of wisdom?

And will I only focus on the big issues that shout for my attention, or will I also notice the smaller gentle gifts that present themselves on my path, as I walk along the shore of my life? Sometimes there are wondrous learnings from small things that whisper, instead of shout. Can I be vigilant enough not to miss those smaller gifts of guidance?

Being the "Wild Woman Walker", I tend to be more active than not. Being still and quiet are not in my nature, and sitting in meditation, with an "empty mind", has always been a real challenge for me. But I still believe in the richness of that quiet sitting time can give. When I can soothe my mind, by focusing on the rhythm of my breath, I am able to experience a vast universe within me. The urgency of my "to do" list, that presses in on me, vanishes and is replaced with a peaceful knowing that all my frantic doing is unnecessary. This bird knows she is cared for. She knows she is safe in a benevolent world. I look at this bird in her resting, being posture, and I feel she knows more than I do.

In my walk on the beach, the sun sets reminding me that everything in this physical world has an beginning and an ending.....every cherished experience, every occasion we wish would last forever, and every living thing...including me. It's not a frightening thought, only a comforting reminder of the dependable cycle of life.... the spiritual law that says, "Do not fear the endings, for they are just making room for a brand new beginning."

Each night, when the sun moves below the horizon, and darkness envelops the sea and all of its activity, the world rests, preparing for a new day that is sure to come, when the sun illumines everything once again. Walking peacefully alongside the rhythm of the sea reminds me of this timeless truth and lovingly lets me know that I am part of that rhythm and that rhythm is part of me.

Note: All photos were taken on the beach at Lincoln City, OR.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

"Everyone is born creative; everyone is given a box of crayons in kindergarten. Then when you hit puberty, they take the crayons away and replace them with dry, uninspiring books on algebra, history, etc. Being suddenly hit years later with the 'creative bug' is just a wee voice telling you, 'I'd like my crayons back, please."

~ Hugh Mac-Leod, car-too-nist,

whose mission is to change the world of art in the world of business in a meaningful way.

Reclaiming my Crayons

When I was a young girl about 8 or 9 years old, all I wanted to be was an artist. To look the part, I wore my mom's old red 40's-style hat, that looked like a beret and created an artist smock from one of Dad's old white shirts. For that Christmas, I had gotten an art easel and plenty of crayons and other scrumptious tools of color, so I was set. I can't remember a single thing I drew or painted during that time I explored being an "artist", but I do remember the fun I had. It was magical to go to my easel each day and experience the joy of creating something new. It was a time when I did not let my beliefs of how things "should be" get in the way of my wild imagination. I did not care about anything but the vibrant, beautiful colors that flowed from my brush onto my paper.

In a magazine, I saw an ad that invited any interested person to draw the profile of a woman and send it in for a chance to "win" free art instruction. Thinking that maybe I should learn something more and be "better" at art than I was, I got busy drawing. I sent in my completed drawing, feeling sure I would "win", but I received back instead a packet, advertising a course in drawing guaranteed to make me a better "artist". Of course, Mom and Dad refused to pay for the drawing course and begging on my part didn't budge them a bit. Sadly, I felt I lost an opportunity to become a real "artist" and the seed of "not being good enough" was planted.

Around Christmas time the following year, in our school, there was a contest to draw and color the perfect Santa Claus. Again I got busy, putting all my artistic skills into creating the best Santa that I could. As I looked at my finished drawing of Santa, smiling back at me, I was sure I would "win" that prize and finally be recognized as a real "artist". Another older student "won" that contest, and even Mom's encouraging words did not console me. I looked at my "Santa", and suddenly he did not look so good any more.

I am not sure exactly when I stopped being an "artist", but when I was 12 years old, I decided that being a scientist might be more fun. I put my "crayons" in away in a drawer, with other discarded junk that I no longer played with, and created a science laboratory in the basement. With test tubes and beakers, purchased from the local drug store, along with many benign powders and liquids, I was ready to start exploring the world of science. So my white "artist" smock became the lab coat of a "scientist". Happily, I saw no "contests" looming around this venture that might intrude on my dream of being a laboratory "scientist".

While I don't believe it was" better" for me to play at art, rather than doing science experiments, I do feel I abandoned a connection with that playful, imaginative inner child. When I received admonishment on my report card for too much daydreaming, my Mom told me it was not good to waste time entertaining my imagination, when there was more important "real" work to be done. And so the "crayons" stayed safely in the darkness of the drawer.

I don't remember doing much art in high school or even college. I had learned that art was for those on the outskirts of society, and it mostly attracted those "rebels" who did not seem to fit in the "real" world. When I was a sophomore in college, I signed up for a drawing class. I was not sure what my motivation was taking that class, in the midst of all my science and math classes. As I walked into the first class, the professor introduced the model, who would be posing nude, and I bolted and ran out of class and dropped my drawing class immediately. I was not only was alienated from my creative imagination, but also I seemed to have incorporated a fear and lack of understanding of art making.

But life has a way of gently (and sometimes, not so gently) bringing you back to your passion and your neglected playful child. The pain and trauma in my life have stripped away my defenses and shouted louder than my fears, opening the way back to the fun and creative play of my inner child. With each life challenge of divorce, separation from my children, illness, and job loss, I took back my crayons. I have survived many life challenges with the support of my coloring, painting. collaging, and drawing. Through my art making, I have been able to let go of my sadness and, by seeing the "bigger picture", have moved on to thriving. Along with the fun and joy of experiencing my imagination and creativity, I have reconnected to my imaginative inner child....to that place of unconditional self love and self nurturance.

So presently, my easel has been replaced by an entire art room, and the crayons are permanently "out of the drawer" and into my hands. Yes, I have even taken classes where I have fearlessly drawn nudes in positions that would make most people blush! Fearless and imaginative......that's the essence and path of the creative Wild Woman Walker!

Saturday, November 16, 2013

"Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened."

~ Anatole France

Purr--fect Wisdom

I belong to a family of four, where three of the members are covered with fur and believe that the most important thing is to be well rested. There is absolutely no stressful situation that could possibly happen that a good nap couldn't cure. Sure meals are great, and the extra food is fun to play hockey with, but nothing could replace snoozing in the sunlight, as it filters in through the window.

Eugenia ( Genie, for short)

Normally, my oldest cat child, Genie, had no trouble relaxing, nor was she shy about sleeping in a bed not designated for her. However, when the boys came to live with us, things changed for her, and she needed a little more "grit" to feel at ease. Hence, she started making use of some places that provided a little "vertical escape". And my cowgirl corner was purrr -fect to feel quite secure it!

Next to all those images of cowgirl power, Genie basks on my file cabinet with a confident glow, looking down at the boy cats who are lounging below her. She knows that "girls rule!"

Casey is snoozing on the left, and Andy is unconscious on the right

The boys, however, are not to be outdone. They prefer a more intellectual, left brain perch on which to doze. My computer stand is the "cat's meow" for cat naps, in their opinion. "Genie can have the cowgirls", they think, "cause we have the supreme resting place on top of this ultimate source of facts and information."

Casey, who is the youngest, believes that if you are at peace with yourself, any place is a great place to curl up for a slumber. The cold porcelain sink makes for a better quality nap by making him a "cool relaxed cat"! He does tend to perk up, however, when a bright flash goes off in the middle of a wonderful snooze. He thinks to himself, "Just why is Mom disturbing my great nap with that light and then laughing about it?!"

Andy knows that you can't feel joyful and be loving if you are tired and troubled. Inner peace is much easier to achieve after you have had "forty winks'', especially on Mom's good pillows that say "joy" and "love".

Friday, November 15, 2013

"The natural movement of your inner world is toward wholeness, toward your center, and toward reconnection with your sacred self. Allowing the inner world to reveal itself brings forth teachings, information, and sometimes suggestions and advice within the unfolding story."

~ Jenny Garrison, Imagery in You, Mining for Treasure in Your Inner World

Crescent Moon Guidance

The only way that makes sense to move through a challenge, like a life threatening illness, is to view it as an opportunity to grow in awareness. You find out very quickly just how much courage you have and what your values are, when you're in a survival mode. You dig down deeply within the core of your inner most self and begin to "mine" the "gold" that you have stored there. You give full attention to all the inner resources within you that have been waiting there patiently for just this kind of occasion. Through your fear and panic, you begin to see a way through this challenge, not right away, but gradually. Just at the point, when you are sure you can't handle being afraid one more second, a sudden insight allows you to see the way in which you can. You will read something in a book or hear someone give a talk on the TV or radio, and suddenly you are filled with a greater understanding of the purpose of your experience. Someone will call you and offer an opportunity that you never previously considered, and your life will open up in an unexpected way.

I just had gone for my first 10 day yoga teacher training at Kripalu in Massachusetts, and I was doing well in offering transpersonal art workshops from my Crescent Moon Creative Center. Since I had retired from teaching public school, life was very good....and that happiness and peace, that often eluded me, seemed to offer itself to me very generously. When I returned from the yoga teacher training, that happiness was quickly turned into fear and sadness, with a diagnosis of cancer. I had to cancel my yoga training at Kripalu, and my Crescent Moon workshop schedule came to an abrupt end.

Along with the traditional treatment, I elected to do every kind of alternative therapy that felt right to me. I did a fast forward training to become a Reiki Master, explored and made use of Louise Hay's healing affirmations in a support group, and created a lot of art, inspired by my inner creative source. I supplemented my health care by consulting with a naturopath and an Ayurvedic doctor, and completely transformed my diet. No frozen dinners for me...everything was prepared and cooked fresh and organic. Self care went from being a "chocolate binge" to a wholesome diet, containing all the nutrients for which my body had been longing for years. I remember cutting up vegetables in the kitchen, during those first months of change, and feeling totally deprived of life's goodies. I would never ever enjoy myself ever again! (I can be quite dramatic when I want to!)

Then the blessings started to come. My initial yoga training gave me the skills to replace the invasive recovery exercise program, given to me by my doctor, with the wonderful, gentle yoga breathing and postures to help me recover in record time. After about six months of the best self care that my body could possibly imagine, my friend and owner of the Cincinnati Yoga School, Diane, called me and asked if I wanted to teach yoga. In almost one single flowing movement, I went from being elated to feeling inadequate and defeated. I told her sadly I thought I couldn't do it.

Diane said to me, "When I first asked you to be a teacher, how did you feel?" In thinking about it, I told her I felt joy and excitement. She replied to me in a confident tone, "I think you should go with that initial feeling. It is the one that is closer to your truth."

So, I said "Yes." Because I had a teaching position, Kripalu also offered me a scholarship to return and finish my yoga teacher training, and I felt I was once again in the "land of the living."

The lessons that I learned, while recovering my sense of "wholeness" during that health challenge, are too numerous to talk about in this blog. But it is enough to say that my perception of life and my relationship to everyone and everything was altered dramatically. With new eyes, I saw opportunities that I had never seen before. I embraced adventure to the extent that I moved across the United States by myself, just because I needed to push myself out of my comfort zone to see further into the depths of who I am.

I learned that things are not always "black and white" and was encouraged to surrender to and respect the mystery that is not visible to me. Just as in the crescent moon, there is a mysterious part in the darkness that I cannot always see. It is still there and needing to be reckoned with, but because it is sometimes hidden, I need to trust an intuitive guidance that is revealed to me, as I need to know it. Requiring trust, it is a knowing that goes beyond rational thought, and it defies explanation. And it often comes when it is least expected, like when Diane offered me a teaching position at her yoga school.

So, as the story of my life continues to unfold, more is revealed to me with each and every experience. Through the changes and tears, amidst the adventures and laughter, I continue to become more aware of all that I am. Will I ever learn all there is to know about me? Can one ever travel to the edge of an infinite starry space? Not likely. I will have to be content to be like the crescent moon... partly illuminated and visible... and partly in the mysterious darkness...that unknown territory yet to be explored.